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The title is not meant to insult or offend large women. In fact, one of my larger female friends coined the term "fat girl snack." I certainly don’t mean to make fun of overweight girls. I know several and would never intentionally hurt them. But let’s keep it real... fat on the body doesn't simply appear. Sometimes it's brought about by a physical condition, but more often it's the result of poor dietary choices -- too many fat girl snacks.
A fat girl snack can be virtually anything edible. However, certain criteria must be met in order to earn Fat Girl Snack status. Certain foods, without question, are Fat Girl Snacks. Everything produced by Hostess, Drake, TastyKake or the evil Little Debbie make the grade. Nearly every week my oven pops out a cake, usually a pound cake, sometimes red velvet, sometimes both. They are definitely Fat Girl Snacks. Candies, cookies, or anything that comes packaged in a bag, marked Wise, Lays, Utz, or Herrs... Fat Girl Snack! There are also items considered fat girl snacks, simply based on the time or intention of consumption. A stack of pancakes at 7:45 in the morning is a meal. A stack of pancakes at 3:45 in the morning is a Fat Girl Snack. In fact... most foods eaten in the wee, small hours of the morning are indeed Fat Girl Snacks.
Intention is always a factor. Are you eating for sustenance or comfort? Fast food is almost always a Fat Girl Snack. However, going at lunchtime removes some of the stigma. After all, it's a noon day meal, but let's be clear. Anything handed off through a window and consumed before you get halfway down the block is what? A Fat Girl Snack. The same applies to most takeout food. Anything fried and encased in Styrofoam is a fat girl snack at any time of the day. FYI: Having a Diet Coke with your meal makes it no less a Fat Girl Snack. You might as well get you a Tahitian Treat or some red Kool-Aid.
I am not condemning the consumption of Fat Girl Snacks. As a matter of fact, I'm a fat girl snack connoisseur. This is a celebration. Wherever I am, I will find the spot. A trip to Chicago is incomplete without a dip into a Harold's (pick a good one... a wrong number could result in the runs). There's no way I can go to DC without hitting Horace and Dickie's for a 4-piece fish sandwich. When in Philadelphia, I eat a cheese steak... just because. In Flatbush we have Kam Man, which serves the best wings I've ever had.. If you go into the Deep South, get some boiled (bald) peanuts and red velvet cake, preferably in the same sitting. Child, it don't matter. Just eat. And if you know of a good spot... please share. You don’t have to be fat or a girl. Holla Back!
